bad trip na tlga qo

sori if i put all of dis here...musta nmn ako?...glit na glit aqo dun sa mga e-mails and frenster msgs nia na nababasa qo, eh anu nmn gnagawa qo? aqo ngaun tong parang sira...at cno nmn un gumugulo sa isip qo? dalawa nga kau ngaun...ahhhhhhh...tama na...isa lng nmn dpt isipin eh..bkit nga ba pareho kau? mali tlga to...maling-mali...im so sori...di qo ini-expect na aabot sa gnito lhat ng kalokohan na 'to...

totally wrong...

i know...but what can i do? hirap pla tlga pag malayo un mahal mo, ang masama p nito, nkikita qo xa s ibang tao...
pero dito qo naguguluhan, dhil b nga magkahawig kau kya qo xa napansin? or tlgang magugustuhan qo un tao khit wla kau resemblance? hai, kelngan maayos qo na 'to...yoko na...nakakaiyak na 'to dilemma na 'to...bkit pa kasi...naku...iba 'to eh..alam qo...iba tlga 'to...

nakakabaliw na 'to...haist...

oi, nasan ka na ba? 1 week and 3 nyts na ata aqo wla blita sau...
laki ng problema qo, mahal qo na yata un kahawig mu...anu b?
kausapin mo qo...hindi qo na to kaya...
N_ _ l _a_ _o versus Nick Risty na ba tlga ang drama ng buhay qo?
un isa ni hindi nga alam na nag-eexist aq...un isa nmn alam na nag-eexist aq wla man lng gngawa pra makausap qo xa...
bkit nmn kc gnito, hindi na qo makatulog ng maayos, natuklasan qo pa friendster account mu at pangalan mu...ayoko na...tama na...

pray for me...
again...for my insanity...

this must be...

whatever u wanna add...=love, my lucky day, it,my lucky shirt= hmmm?

kwento lng...tgal ko kc nawala sa eksena, xempre kinda busy right now...and uber tired...
monday, enrolment 'nila'...super nalungkot aqo kc kpag di ko xa nkita, wla na...
di qo n malalaman name nia...nakakabaliw na 'tong pagsearch qo ha, in all fairness nmn sa kin...
lunch tym, cguro before 1pm, nakasalubong qo xa sa admin...eon, nkita qo nga, pero lalo ako nawalan ng pag-asa na malaman un name nia kc feeling qo naka-enrol na xa...hai...
tas habang busy aq sa pagbibilang ng mga dpat bilangin, andun aqo at pasilip-silip sa window, nagbabakasakali lng nmn...at di qo n tlga xa nkita...
eto un eh, naglalakad na qo palabas ng school..nakakita aqo ng rubber shoes na feeling qo eh familiar looking...hmmm..at nang tignan qo, hehehe, xa nga un! akalain qo b nmn...tlga nga nmn ang pagkkataon...halos sabay kmi palabas (w/o him knowing about my existence in the world)...di qo nga lng nkita kng anu byahe un sinakyan nia jeep pauwi...teka, nakasabay qo na xa sia one tym...oct. 4 ata un kc nun lng nagresume ang class after ng bagyo? hmmmm pa ulit...sa may salitran xa sumakay nun tym na un...hai tlga...
at un na, tuluyan ng nawalan ng pag-asa...nakared shirt aqo nun 4...

at ngaun, friday na,guess i was wearing the same red shirt?...salamat sa mga malilinaw na mata, 2pm na ata, tama b? mejo nagbreak kmi kc tuloy-tuloy mula 10-2, hehe, alang lunch break?! eon, nkita ko n nmn xa! mejo nabuhayan ako ng loob, lipat p qo sa kabilang counter pra silipin kng san xa pupunta...eon, wla man lng ako sapin sa paa, tignan qo lng nmn...at dhil nga malinaw mata qo, nkita qo me hawak na regform...hehe, abot tenga na ngiti qo, mejo n22wa na tlga qo...at un itinuro qo sa mga bossing qo, ang saya kc eh...hehe, bkit daw gnun hair mu? enwei, bsta...at ang pinakamasaya sa lahat, kumuha xa ng number sa guard, kya sure na qo na ngaun lng xa magbabayad! yey! eto n un mtgal ko na hinihintay...hehe...at un na, mejo aberya pa ng konti, di pa pumapasok s may counter and un...nagbayad na xa...hehe...

at eto p ang pinakamalaking surprise dun, mtagal qo na pla alam name nia...un name na una qo pinaghinalaan, xa pla tlg un! di qo nmn akalain... thanks sa computer number 61, hehe... at ngaun, alam qo na name nia...yey!

eto lng...sna ma-overcome qo na 'to! tutal alam qo n nmn eh, mawawala rin cguro 'to agad...nawa...i'm keeping my fingers crossed on this...

hai

ang lungkot na masaya...
nu n nmn b nangyayari sakin?
meron ako mga friends na muling nagresurface, o kya nmn nito ko lng ulit nakita...
hehe...
pero wla lng...meron din mga nawawala sa buhay qo...
ayoko ng ganito pakiramdam...napapaisip n nmn ako...
hai...duty na tomorrow...i need to start my last sem (hopefully) right...
gudluck!

SM madness

huhuhu...after how many days na paghahanap ko sa kanya
nakita ko rin xa finally...
kya lang meron xa kasama girl...
sad tlg...

musta n nmn 'to? bumabalik n nmn ang mga di dapat maalala...

1st time/s...

dami kasi eh...
we went to dlsu...library ang target nmin...wow! wala kmi nahanap! galing! hehe...though there r lotsa books and journals, wla dun un mga hinahanap nmin...enwei, they provided us with some test (thanks to the ref and info sec) hehe...
then...sm mall of asia...hehe, dun kmi naglunch (around 3:30pm), lunch p nga bang mttawag un? hehe...and un, thanks to uj kc napuntahan qo rin sa wakas un church na lagi ko nkkita prang pag nsa baclaran...yey!

manila

we r going to la salle manila tomorrow...hai...dont have lotsa money to travel nowadays...tagtuyot kpag sembreak...but we need to go there to be able to finish revising our thesis...huhuhu

what's in store for me?

today is october 14...yah ryt...i dont know what to do...

where did i go wrong, i lost a frend...so the song of the fray goes...

i am supposed to be 'happy' today...yep...but no, i am not...

what's in store for me? i dunno...i still have 11.5 hours left...after that, then i wud know, where all of this would end...

Dahilan...

/barbie almalbis

Alam ko na ang pangalan mo,
pati address at telepono
Sa daming kwentong umiikot,
alam ko na rin ang ayaw mo.

Ngunit lahat nang ito ay walang kahulugan
Kung di rin lang ikaw ang matagpuan/katapusan

Ang pag-ibig ko ay walang saysay
Kung 'di rin lang ikaw ang dahilan...

Naaalala ko ang dati,
magkasama hanggang hating gabi
Di bale na kung ano ang sabihin nila,
habang buhay magkabati.

Binabasa kita,
malapit nang magkita,
isinusuri ko ang mga letra...

:: to my 'eyes'...one year na tau, akalain natin un?! yey! i love u po Ü

How to Save a Life...

Step one you say we need to talk
He walks you say sit down it's just a talk
He smiles politely back at you
You stare politely right on through
Some sort of window to your right
As he goes left and you stay right
Between the lines of fear and blame
And you begin to wonder why you came

Where did I go wrong,
I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

Let him know that you know best
Cause after all you do know best
Try to slip past his defense
Without granting innocence
Lay down a list of what is wrong
The things you've told him all along
And pray to God he hears you
And pray to God he hears you

Where did I go wrong,
I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

As he begins to raise his voice
You lower yours and grant him one last choice
Drive until you lose the road
Or break with the ones you've followed
He will do one of two things
He will admit to everything
Or he'll say he's just not the same
And you'll begin to wonder why you came

Where did I go wrong,
I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

How to save a life
How to save a life

Where did I go wrong,
I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life


...like the message...a song by the Fray... i guess we did the right thing, at least that's how we see it...

not in the mood...

to write stuffs lately...maybe because im really exhausted...hai...need to take a break...

school buzz...

well, i was shocked to see our school in such a bad state...it now looks like a jungle-semi-forest thing...the sight -- unbearable...and the heat...before, u can roam around the campus w/o using an umbrella but now, u will really need one...

bfore i went to school, there wer meralco ppol checkin the lines...harhar Ü thank God they finally made it to the outskirts of Anabu...well, glad they came to check on us...

back to school, meeting...OD,we need to wrap up everything...gives me headache though...and still gt no e-mail from Nick, hello i'm still alive!

:: eto un eh...my sister txted me around 2:30pm...MAY KURYENTE NA! hurray!


(written on October 4, 2006)

from frenster...na nmn!

1. single or taken? :: taken
2.Do you have a crush on anyone? :: yep, iee, kahawig kc ni Nick...
3. Do they know? :: hindi, i dnt even know his name...malamang di rin xa aware sa existence qo
4. Do you flirt a lot? :: hindi
5. Who was your best relationship with? :: my baby...puro lungkot at luha..hehe, kidding Ü
6. Do cheaters deserve a 2nd chance? :: yeah, pero pag naulit, ibang usapan na un...
7. Serious or Fun-loving? :: both, knows when to b serious and when to hav fun dapat...
8. Humor or Romance? :: humor?study nina krisca 'to ah...enwei, pareho...
9. Dark or light hair? :: dark and shiny and straight! haha
10.Shorter or taller than you? :: taller
11. Do you kiss strangers? :: what the? never been kissed olryt?
12. Do you hug strangers? :: not yet (hehe, parang may balak...joke)
13.How long was your longest relationship? :: almost one year na..nxt week sna un na...
14. Do you believe in kissing when you are not together yet? :: no, no, no, no
15. Do you think about the opposite sex a lot? :: hindi nmn
16. Have you ever slept at a friend of the opposite sex's house? :: yep, but not alone...
17. Do you tell your friends they are hot? :: no, pretty yes...
18. Would you rather have a sweet, clever guy/ girl or a wild one? both, pero dapat mas lamang na sweet and clever...
19. Have you ever liked someone a lot (and they knew it) who didn't like you back? :: m not sure...
20. Do you feel comfortable with joking with your friends who are the opposite sex? :: yep, one of the boys ako eh...
21.Chocolates or flowers? :: both
22. Have you ever been in the friends-with-benefits situation? ::uhm? hindi pa? haha
23. Teddy Bear or Card?:: card, hopeless romantic aqo eh...
24. Would it be sweet or annoying if someone of the opposite sex called just to say hi? ::teka, napaisip ako, hehe...
25. Ever felt like your girlfriend/boyfriend didn't like you? :: at times, yes...
26. Ever been cheated on? :: yep...sad noh?
27. Ever done the cheating? :: cheating ba mttwag ang pag-alam sa name,course at section ng kahawig ng boyfrend qo? haha, if oo, wla na qo magagawa jan!
28. Ever cried over a break up? :: cried yes, break-up? almost...
29. Ever kissed or hugged your girlfriend/ boyfriend in front of a teacher and got in trouble? :: never
30. Do you believe in miracles? :: definitely!
31. Is it easy for you to get over people who were special to you? :: no...
32. Have you ever made a birthday wish or blew on a dandelion on a relationship? :: well...
33. Have you ever had a broken heart? :: many times...

sipag-sipagan

i guess, i wke up on the ryt side of the bed,literally...just opened my eyes and without wanting to get outta bed, i reached for the PinkShoes i purchased las tym...thought it was a boring read but nah, as the story progresses it's alright, i mean, it's great...

::: i' m not expecting that we'll have the electricity back by now, maybe somehow im gettin used to itand i'm just making my life sooooo damn miserable every time i think about this whole situation negatively...

im happy (not quite...but still...) for making myself productiv and quite useful...after helping nanay to do the laundry, i cleaned ate's room, then we (nanay and me) went to the market, ako taga-bitbit...hehe...got my hair cut-short..and later this afternoon, super-igib aqo ng tubig...hehe, lumalaki na mga muscles qo...no one's gotta do it for me eh (sigh...) and then i read again...inayos ko rin mga gamit qo...tambak tlga (mas ok kc skin ang magulo habang nag-aaral), i can easily find the things that i need...with nothing left to do, i would clean the house with a big smile on my face Ü...but sumhow, this 'kuryente-thing' is really bugging me...

i heard that we'll get the electricity back by Oct. 18, what the?! that'll be 15 days from now, come on...whatabout my projects? oh my, this also affects my luvlyf and my net-lyf...huhuhuhu...

:: baka pag-open ko ng mail - ' baby, break na tau' waaah....joke...

i called diane (via pldt)...i miss this gurl so much and so the rest of the hayskul tropa...


(written on Oct. 3, 2006)

octoberPEST part 2...

What do u reckon? 5 days without electricity and worse… water…ahhhh…I’m losing every inch of patience I have within my body…I went to tita’s office to charge my fone…well yes, congratulations! My fone made it to 4 days without recharging whatsoever! –no fone calls, except for checking on my balance and minimal exchange of SMS with friends…I thought we still share the same sentiments, but nah…they got their ‘kuryente’ while I am still lurking in the dark… with a battalion of mosquitoes biting every part of me exposed to them…well, the thing in my nose, it’s a zit, just looks like one of the mosquito bites,ehehe…

I wanna scream! what the?! got no class today…and to my astonishment ate Mich txted me a while ago that we’re still free 2moro – due to extensive damage made by that superMilenyo to the school –well, I for one, will remember how bad Milenyo hit the country…leaving all of us devastated…
--->for a million milestone…maybe for my entire lifespan…


(written on Oct. 2, 2006)

OctoberPEST!

4 days w/o electricity and I’m still sane…well, sorta…kinda…but I can’t do anything…I need to use the computer badly! Our website project is still hanging… good luck to us, guess we’ll be damned for all eternity if we won’t start it right away…we all know that it’s not easy to make one, esp. for me because i’m not majoring in computer…picture a psych major doing a web page…a really nice one…oh,well, I guess that’d be Krisca or Zielo…but aaaah…what about me? us? (ujin, hehe, hello there buddy!)..well good luck tlga…if only Harry Potter cud help us – in just one swish of his wand…hehe…kidding…
God is the only answer, and He’s the reason why I’m still sane…He covers me with much more sanity because He knows that I really need it…thanks dear God for ur patience, though I’m so kulit and reklamador…and for loving us big time! (kaye ikaw ba yan?!)

^^went to Rob to meet with Arnold, one of my best buddies…nice Ü nagMcDo kmi (libre nia) and nag-girl-hunting kami for him, tama ba ito? I told him not to do it (again) if he’s with me kc girls myt think that he’s already taken (by me? ^big grin^ hehe)…he replied “ok lng bes, mukha ka namang lalake”…ouch!...hehe, enwei, he said he’s just kidding…I took it as a compliment, really, no harm done Ü…then after so much blabbering and chikas I made, we went to NBS and I impulsively bought 2 books, Vince’s Life and Pink Shoes thinking that those booklings were on sale (with violet-circled tags)..but oh no! a big mistake…


(written on October 1, 2006)

(after) the storm

28 September 2006

by 10am very strong winds and rain reigned over the earth...Southern Luzon in particular...guess torpedo/es attacked us...by 12noon, it came to a sudden stop...the sky cleared...and so is the surrounding...it's all messed-up...trees (as in the large ones) were brought down by the super typhoon Milenyo (pati ugat dala...imagine how strong the winds were...) and some of neighbor's roofs too...real bad...after 45 minutes or so, we really thought that it was over, however, another blow came surging down again...also a strong one...you can hear the wind whistling you could've mistaken it as a siren from a passing ambulance...

after raining very hard and the extreme blowing of the wind, it's finally over...in the afternoon, we thought that the water will reach our house kc ung pagkataas-taas na bangbang -- isang dipa na lang malapit nang mapuno...

i forgot to mention, wlang kuryente from 9 am...


29 September 2006


woke up from a deep sleep...exhausted kahapon...i cried (yesterdei) kc i was thinking --kung kami nga na may bahay namumroblema, what more un mga kapatid ntin n nkatira malapit sa ilog or dagat? at un mga wla tlga bahay? at un mga naliparan or natanggalan ng bubong? pati un mga walang kakainin? hai...let's pray for them...if we could do something else...

as i've said wla p rin kuryente...got to read books (during daytime) written by Bo Sanchez, books na andito lng sa cabinet ni ate all along, ngaun ko lng nabuklat... i must admit, super wla tlgang magawa...pero un...it's nice kc i gt to read nga...inspiring and simple testimonies (prang user-friendly book about God)...hopefully, i cud live up to it...na-cover-an ko na rin un book ni Cams na Boy meets Girl, borrowed it last prelim, not yet through with it...

aside from the reasons i've mentioned (those that cud melt our hearts...) mron din mga mababaw na mga reasons kng bkit sad aqo na wlang kuryente...wlang tv, wlang radyo, wlang computer/internet...at walang tubig! back to basics ang buhay...as in gmit k ng plantsang-de-uling...at sobrang maaappreciate mo ang importance ng water..plus the fact na maraming lamok sa gabi...buti nakkatulog p mga tao dito...


30 September 2006

Camille txted me las nyt, cancelled ag leadership seminar, pati TNPA's nyt...sad aqo dhil:
1. super pagod c Cams sa pag-aasikaso sa mga events na 'to
2. c Zielo rin, sa reservations, etc.
3. at mga EB...
4. for the speakers - kc ung isa umuwi p ng Cavite pra lng mkapagTalk
5. members - for the possible learning...sayang...
6. TNPA - kc wlang points!

alam qo c Zielo rin dami problema, defense nila ngaun, supposedly, pero un...let's just see what'll happen...dami na surprises noh? hang on...

nga pla...ninang ako sa binyag ni Kerby, anak ni kuya Mylee...eon ayos nmn...cute din ang aking second-inaanak...

at...wla p rin kuryente, pero sa ibang parte ng daigdig eh meron na..tinext qo pa c ate (roaming) pra i-e-mail c Nick at sbhin na wla p rin kuryente d2...hopefully, nanonood xa ng news at nalaman nia ang mga pangyayari...

//kala qo mkkpagsimula na qo sa website na proj sa comp. subj., hindi p tlga...'un grup dy reflection qo, nkasave sa PC, wla back-up...un docu nmin, ewan ko lng...wla rin kmi hand-out sa physio, sana di muna magQuiz...

...pero sa dami ng unos na sabay-sabay dumating, marami p rin tau dpat ipagpasalamat kay God...unang-una we are still alive! napakafortunate p rin ntin kc we got to eat 3-5 meals a day if we would want to...God is sooooo good! that's what i've realized dis last 3 days...away from the 'ever-magulong buhay'...God loves us so much!

my cellphone--3 days na buhay w/o recharging...haha


(written on September 30, 2006)